Introduction

 

 

It’s 2am and the time of the Dark of the Moon. These three days preceding the New Moon are a time of great power. They hold the energies of awakening and clarity. They offer the opportunity for releasing and letting go so the new can emerge. Within the divine feminine cycles of the moon, the Black Moon creates the space for planting seeds and opening to new possibilities. The next Black Moon will be on my birthday, 31st October. It is the perfect time to begin sharing my story.

 

 

From the time of my earliest artistic attempts in 1974, people have often asked about the story behind the creative process of my art. That is the purpose of this book. To piece together a short chronicle of my life as an artist so that you may appreciate how the events in my life led me to my present work. With the intention to be clear and honest, I will share the spiritual and physical experiences that drove my creative urge and shaped the changes in my artistic style over the years.

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When I started publishing my art in books, although there were always healthy book sales, I received very little feedback from those who bought the books. Today the internet and social media have changed that. But in the early years it was like creating my work in something of a vacuum. In that void I was very reluctant to share the background of my work in the books. That was down in the most part from being very cautious about sharing the remarkable and extraordinary mystical experiences involved in the work. Would I sound foolish? I also didn’t want to foster a perception of myself as some kind of spiritual teacher. My understanding and awareness have evolved from my journey, not cut and pasted from spiritual teachers or traditions. What I share here may resonate with you. Perhaps it won’t. And that is as it should be.

I have gained many insights from meeting people who have collected, cherished, and been inspired by my books over the years.  Hopefully the background I share in this book will give a better understanding of what was happening in the studio, how that reflected on the art produced, and who Courtney was and is.
 

This journey has often taken me on a very rough passage, including and perhaps especially living with incessant back pain throughout my life. Yet I have learnt not to take these obstacles and challenges personally. Each hurdle was something that I needed to work with and not work against. There have been many lessons that I needed to learn. Sometimes I skirted around them to avoid confronting the learning and clearing that was called for. But in stepping back from dealing with these situations and cycles I have recognized that they always return to me. Slightly different perhaps each time, but always with essentially the same challenging lesson.
 

When I decided to share my story I did not want it to be a warts-and-all biography. I have purposely left out some of the darker dramas that happened along the way, incidents involving individuals who are greedy, jealous, and, having no creative skills of their own, willing to steal from others. Yes, there were times when I looked for some kind of Karmic retribution. But my view of life is now very different, their dealings hold no sting. It was what it was. It is what it is.
 

People often imagine that I have always worked in a wonderful idyllic space. Most of the time that was far from the reality of it. My work and my books were often created in makeshift ‘studios’ set up in people’s attics and freezing cold barns. Beyond the challenges of my creative spaces, the energies themselves were often far from idyllic. The Merlin Energy was extremely challenging. There was a great deal of shaking my fist in the air in desperation at the trials I was going through. Yet these trials have brought me to where I am today. They forged the inspirational source that works through this humble form of Courtney. I stand in deep gratitude for all of it.

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MY STORY